Living Virtuously in a Virtual World

Jul 14, 2010

 Recently I was thinking about how and why so many people on Xbox Live seem to be rude, self centered, maniacal, obnoxious Timmies.  Is it because the virtual environment allows anonymity or is it just a true representation of these gamers inner psyche coming out? 

For some,  like the Timmies ( young gamers that usually range in age from 10-18 who represent themselves as GameStop gangsters,  L33T players and or indifferent to responsibility and authority ) I think it is more about social acceptance by their peers and a perceived belief that by acting in an overly macho way you somehow are inserting yourself into the alpha class of the virtual society on Live.  This behavior, while extreme in many cases, is an extension of normal social behavior found in the real world for kids this age.  I am not giving them a pass, but I do think that they are brainwashed into emulating certain pop culture stereotypes and that this medium of expression allows everyone, from geek to jock and unpopular to cool, to recreate themselves into whatever they want…and what they want is to be like everyone else.  So the cycle of poor behavior is self fulfilling, to be cool one must be a dick and that is passed along in an almost viral way via YouTube, FaceBook, MySpace, Twitter and yes Live.

But what about the adult gamers, those who are older than 18?  One would expect that because they are in the process of getting a degree or starting jobs and families that they would be less inclined to succumb to such peer pressure.  If we believe that, then what drives them to be hate filled, racist, homophobic, misogynistic bullies?  It would appear that because they are protected by the security of being unknown, their true feelings and fears are freed from the constraints of normal society.  None would dare walk into a room and say the things they do on Live, yet because the room is virtual and the people there are simply names and voices, why not push the boundaries of what many would consider to be appropriate?  There is no consequence for their actions in the real world, so it is seen as not only safe, but based on the sheer volume of people who act this way, accepted.

Does this mean that manners and responsible behavior are not welcome on Live, to the contrary, I find many respond with gratitude and genuine happiness.  Commenting on good play or assisting others  who seem to be having difficulty is just as rewarding as it would be in your everyday life.  Yes, there are those who will mock you or decry your actions as “gay” or  some other perceived insult.  But for the few who you help or show kindness to, their experiences for those moments have been utterly changed for the better.  As a responsible adult gamer, I pride myself in not engaging or acting in the manner of the Timmies, old or young.  I set an example for my children by playing this way, so that they will not follow the horrible example set by others. 

I understand the desire to fit in.  Being liked or accepted by our peers is a compulsion we have as humans, for good or ill that is just a psychological fact.  But as humans we have the unique ability to determine right and wrong.  So the next time you want to tell that whining child all the things you did to his mother last night or why a particular player should turn of his machine, burn it and then engage in a self hating act, remember that despite their actions they are still people and not just idiotic names of self-aggrandizing hype and high pitched hyperbole in your earpiece.  As members of a gaming community who take pride in the fact that we are grownup and mature, we should also emulate that belief in how we act both online and off.  Sure the path of least resistance is to simply do nothing or even engage in similar behavior, but who are we helping and most importantly who are we hurting by doing this?  I’m not advocating rampant policing of the system, but instead why not a marginal increase in basic manners and maybe a bit of old fashioned good will?  Who knows, maybe that person you touch on Live will pass that on, and so forth and so on.  Is it a pipe dream, sure, but I prefer a pipe dream to the nightmare that currently exists and I am the type of person who sees the good in others rather than just the bad…call it a character flaw if you will. 

“People of character do the right thing, not because they think it will change the world but because they refuse to be changed by the world.”

~ Michael Josephson